14 December 2005

cat shit

Watching the cat wash his arse today, I couldn’t help but wonder about the taste of shit. Presumably cats have only two facial options available to them – closed mouth and open mouth – and are therefore unable to grimace. Possibly the taste of their bums doesn’t offend them. Or maybe the answer can be found in Mother Nature’s website FAQs, along with the explanation of why one’s own noxious emissions are so much more bearable than that of others.

You never see cats going off for a drink of water to get the taste out of their mouth after they are done washing and they do seem to spend a disproportionate amount of washing time licking their lookalike Cigarette-Smoker’s-Mouths compared to the rest of their bodies. I figured therefore that their kitty Goo Goos really doesn’t taste all that rank to them.

What remains a mystery however is why they narrow their eyes and glare in haughty disdain when their dinner is not quite to their taste. Even more curious is if all cats are fussy about their food yet all cats don’t mind washing their arses, why cat food manufacturers haven’t brought out cat food out in Feces Flavour?

10 comments:

Die Muräne said...

Sometimes my cats eat the vomit of each other. Might be another flavour...? I smell big business, Jane.

davedudeski said...

I think your on
to something...
have you thought
of a name yet?

maybe shitskas,
buttmunch or
sphincterkibble.

jungle jane said...

actually i barfed on mine accidentally last week die murane. i guess they are obliged to lick everything - perhaps their lives aren't all that cool after all?

dudeski i gonna name it Cat Skat flavour. funny yet marketable...

Calzone said...

"Can't help wonder about the taste of shit"

I love it when you play it coy with me baby.

jungle jane said...

awww blush calzone. now lemme go practise my bad-ass lisp...

HighMaintenanceHussy said...

i can't deal with uppity cats. that's why i have gay dogs.

jungle jane said...

But hussy they are so similar - my cat adores his own arse. your gay dogs love each others arses.

I reckon it all stinks of shit....

josh williams said...

My parents had my fart glands removed when I was a lad of nine. I have not passed gas since.I consider this an act of abuse but have trancended these feelings and still communicate with them.They just people after all and they never made me lick me bum, so I count my blessings.

ta said...

You of all people my dear haven't ever had an indepth conversation with somebody who's given a rimjob in their life?

jungle jane said...

josh your rage is repressed, i can tell. You should punch a pillow real hard, dude. it's okay to feel the pain.

ta i am sure i have, but i'm so naive i probably thought it was coffee stains around their mouth...