27 February 2006

pavements

90 comments:

Bloodgood said...

Yea! Im NUMBER 1 if I hurry.
your post fill up so quickly.

jungle jane said...

and by the looks of it...i am a number two....

Bloodgood said...

Ok now that I have secured my spot.

How did you get the dog, to do that?

Has the dog not heard of grass?

Filthy Animal, and I love dogs.

jungle jane said...

Bloodgood give me my damn dog back.

i didn't get the dog to do it - Henri Banks very kindly did the honours for me. he is a photoshop genius!

PDD said...

Janey:
Obviously you are the kinky type.

DorianGray1854 said...

How dare that damn mutt shit on such a lovely face!!

Vince said...

I'm not too sure how to comment to this--maybe invest in a nappy.

PDD said...

Dorian:
You are missing the point. Janey has a fetish...

DorianGray1854 said...

I'm gonna spank him with a rolled up newspaper!!

PDD said...

i was supposed to come after dorian. it must have been the gods.

DorianGray1854 said...

Then when I'm finished maybe you could spank me!!

PDD said...

My hands are only for Pinky. But if you insist....

Zen Wizard said...

(Can't think of a "witty comment" that is not rude as hell...experiencing Commentus interruptus...)

Jesus Toast said...

That dog has horrible aim with its ass. It completely missed you head.

jungle jane said...

PDD:
Its only kinky if you use the whole chicken

Dorian:
I know! its outrageous - he didn't even wipe afterwards! At least goats use toilet paper!

Vince:
you could always make a few skat jokes?

Zen:
Well i am not sure we tolerate rudeness in The Jungle. I like to think that this is a 'family friendly' blog...

Toast:
It definitely can't aim straight - it must be a male dog.

Bloodgood said...

You certainly have this family hooked!

I love your dog! He just needs to learn proper etiquette for pooping.

Jesus Toast said...

What are you talking about? I have amazingly accurate aim with my ass! I have never ever went to take a shit and actually missed the toilet bowl. I am literally at a 100% ratio with attempted shittings into the bowl and actual successful hits.

Now if we're referring to shooting liquid from my penis, well, no, I just close my eyes and squirt away, not really worried about what I hit (though I'd prefer there to be tonsils at some point).

jungle jane said...

Bloodgood:
ha bloody ha. very funny. you know *perfectly* well that my dog is at your house right now...

Toast:
I guess my next blog post could balance things out - would you mind posing for a picture of your penis resting on my tonsils? we'd make it artistic...not lik the usual filth on my blog...

Jesus Toast said...

If its done tastefully, then yes, I guess I'd let you allow me to rest my penis on your tonsils. I hate those crass blowjob pictures you see all the time in the local news. Can I go back to my own blog now or can we just exhange phone numbers or something?

This coinstant typing thing is bothersome. Q.

Denny Shane said...

How can someone so damn sexy and hot... allow a dog... wait... now I don't even know what the hell I was gonna say. lol

Denny Shane said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Bloodgood said...

Please post any pics and all pics with toast penis and your tonsils, the act of penis resting has become forbbidden at my house and I would like to see what I am missing.

P.S. *MY* dog is about to go out for a piss

jungle jane said...

Toast:
I am not entirely sure that my idea of tasteful is the same as everyone elses. of course if you are willing to risk your penis...

Denny:
At least he didn't poop on the pavement...

Bloodgood:
oh the penis thing is just a ruse to make Dorian jealous....

Pixie Sprinkle said...

arrrr...arrrr...Dorian is mine...

Captain Carl said...

ARRRR......what be this shit all about....Carla......we lust fer Janey......remember your a lesbian.........

YellowSock said...

Animals are just drawn to you Jane.

I would also like to see any and all tonsil/penis shots. I have no tonsils so I too would like to see what I'm missing.

Mongrel Porksword said...

Jane, two things:

1) I think I've got you beat.

2) If Toast backs out for whatever reason, feel free to photoshop my johnson on your tonsils.

Zen Wizard said...

What "Families" are you "Friendly" to, other than Manson, Soprano, and Addams???

jungle jane said...

Carla:
okay clear the room everyone - me and carla are going to have a cat fight...

Carl:
Keep your bitch under control will you?

Sausage:
i have no penis and i too would like to see what i am missing. i bet if i did have a penis it would be like MASSIVE...

Mongrel:
How on earth did you get the dog to use the toilet??

Zen:
Are you saying i should give up my ambition to be a primary school teacher??

ticharu said...

Oh shit!

The Lady Muck said...

I must say I am slightly concerned that of all the people you could of had it shitting on you chose yourself...
*looks concerned*

Chatty said...

Oh, shit, lol, I've had a week like that!

Roscoe said...

My dog drags her ass on the ground. Don't ask why, she won't say.

On the last post - Boxing. . . Jane, let's clinch and nibble ears.

Josh, you = a dork X 3

gav said...

The dog has taste. Can't even convince one to piss on me.

Zen Wizard said...

Maybe a super-sadistic private school--Does The Citadel have Elementary School?

ChickyBabe said...

Bad bad doggy!

wallycrawler said...

At lest your doing your part in keeping Sydney clean .

jungle jane said...

Tich:
bless you! do you need a hankerchief??

Lady Muck:
I was going to make it our prime minister but i realised no-one would know who it is. So i took a deep breathe and volunteered myself. neat, huh?

Chatty:
my past 2 years is summed up in that one picture

roscoe:
perhaps she has a REALLY heavy shit on board?

Oh and Josh said to tell you that you're a sackful of dorks.

Gav:
you should try dressing up as a tree...

Zen:
just because i want to tie you up with that tie and lash you with a telephone chord does NOT mean i am sadistic.

ChickyBabe:
Bad Bad Jungle Jane!

Wally:
I am thinking of designing Jungle Jane toilet paper. do you think it will sell??

Polyman2 said...

See Dick piss,
see Jane smile,
see spot shit.
Fun with Dick, Jane & Spot.

wallycrawler said...

"I'd buy that for a dollar" ! Jane it would be of great pride and dignity , that I could wipe my ass of you !

wallycrawler said...

But I have a bidet !

josh williams said...

By the look of the dogs face he was pained to shit on your image. Probably someone in the background threatening not to pet him/her. Jane your a strong woman and the dog this under duress....
So hows come your TV aint workin'?

josh williams said...

Roscoe is a dork x eleventy! A reliable source told me so! Put that in your pipe and smoke it!

jungle jane said...

Poly:
Spot on!

Wally:
you could keep it in the loo for decorative purposes? maybe blow your nose on it??

Josh:
I wasn't getting any work done with the telly on! it might be back on this weekend for a bit...last sunday was a riot...

Oh and Roscoe said to tell you that you should stop pretending to be male...

Satan said...

this is a version of the hot carl

i gave you people this

dammit why dont you love me

fuck

Pixie Sprinkle said...

Has anyone seen my dog??

Bloodgood said...

Not you too Carla. He is MY dog!!

Satan, hot Carl makes for an interesting evening, Ill give you that. But it kinda stinks up the place.

jungle jane said...

Satan:
I can wrap the shit up and post it to you if you like??

Carla:
You're a skank whore. I ran over your dog.

Bloodgood:
Fuck. that was your dog? ooooops...

Captain Carl said...

Arrrr...ay smell some mean shit brewin....

as fer that dog......lets try ta keep the poop off the poop deck.........its to close to the Capt's quaters........

matty said...

OH, NO! Jungle Jane -- that dog is shitting upon your glossy flyer! he is not worthy!

Jerry said...

a dog is a dog
unless you are a dog
that is different
you know what I mean...woof!

Henri Banks said...

Jerry you are so smart but realy look to that dog i think its a kat a big german kat

Fuckkit said...

Can I borrow the dog? Coz I have a big ol' list of people that need to be shat on.

PDD said...

Janie:
Oh, so that's how you wing it down there in Australia.

(I should have come here sooner. I am busy with bimbos on my back)

AndyW said...

I think that's how all dogs feel about their owners.

josh williams said...

Jane you were very close to being shit faced. Tell Roscoe to shut his fibbin' hole!
Oh by the way if I'm not a man then why wont MM let me in his damned contest? eh? Case closed.

Toby said...

Jane, are you Japanese?

jungle jane said...

Cappy:
so...the pavement outside my house is your quarters? wow! not much sea there....

Matty:
that's okay - i did a shit in his food bowl to get him back

Jerry:
a dog is
A dog
Unless
it's a bitch

yanno what i'm saying??

Henri:
And what do German parrots look like? Horses?

Fuckkit:
so much dogshit...so little time...you can have the dog - do you want me to send you the shit too to make it easier?

PDD:
Aussie dogs are so lacking in class. you can tell by the colour of his shit...

Andy:
actually you are right. that dog is making a political statement.

Josh:
i voted for you. i did. even though you haven't entered. i got all my neighbours to vote for you too. Roscoe refused but i think he's just jealous.

Toby:
No. but i am considering selling the shit in a vending machine.

kellywalters said...

jj lovelie..

What the fuck is this shit?? What is this? what is is Jungle? What the hell is this picture supposed to mean Jane? What is your strange Aussie mind thinking? What where you thinking? What happened to that dog? What the hell did it eat? What is going on here?

heheh.. I thought that would be entertaining

ing said...

Fido, your leash is too long. . .

Fuckkit said...

Just send me the dog, I plan to feed it bran for a week then use it as a spray gun.

Roscoe said...

Josh – No more name-calling. The Australian vixen is stepping on our buddyship since fourth grade. Remember our pact – “Women will make us do stupid stuff but no name calling”. Remember? (Dork to infinity)

Toby said...

You'll need a lot more dogs. Or at least a few bigger ones.

The Taker of Gist said...

That picture is funny for both latent and manifest reasons. But I cannot speak of the latter, as I am a transient particulate.

As to the former, the picture contains trace amounts of Gist. This leads me to believe it was a deliberate attempt to humor me. Or rather, to humor all of humanity. At the expense of the few.

Captain Carl said...

arrr....how ya be Janey....ay need ta rest me eyes for a sec......ay think Carla spilled her split pea soup, all over the locker.......

PDD said...

Janey:
I love your response about selling the dog shit in vending machines.
lol

Sparkle said...

Getting shit on is just plain hot! Just like you Jane!

jungle jane said...

Roxi:
fucked if i know! one minute i am lying wasted on the pavement and the next my face is all warm!

Ing:
Its long enough for me to strangle him with..

Fuckkit:
set fire to him with a match - he'd be a canine landmine.

Roscoe:
Josh told me he knew you would back down first. he said he's never lost a round of "you're a poo poo" to you. ever.

Toby:
Actually i was going to add some of my own. but shhhhh...don't tell the japanese....

Gist:
My intention was to amuse you. but only you. i wanted to make everyone else cry like girls.

Cappy:
If Carla wasn't your soft, feminine side i SWEAR i would set fire to her nighty. My god that girl needs to get her mouth washed out.

PDD:
Maybe i could sell dogs in vending machine too?

Sparkle:
yes its a bit like getting a face mask, just a bit smellier...

wallycrawler said...

Hey JJ what kind'a dog is that ? Is that one of dem dar Dingo Dogs we all here about ?

I shit bigger than that there Dingo ! I no fear dat Dingo !

Bloodgood said...

I have a friend whose dog eats its own shit right after it gets done going and then it comes inside and throws up its own shit on his floor. He told me there is nothing worse than cleaning up regurgitated shit.
P.S. Just so you know it is not my dog. It is truly my friends dog.

Adrian said...

That's probably one of the coolest pictures i've ever seen....... The dog crapping on the picture picture was pretty cool too.

Toby said...

Your own? That's a gold mine. I can see it now, all the dirty little succubuses rubbing themselves ragged on the streets of Tokyo...

Better hurry, Satan's been there already.

Roscoe said...

OK. Now the shit has hit the fan!

PDD said...

You would add to the economy, what with all the accesories that would go along with said dog i.e. collers, bones, sweaters, booties, pillowcases, rope...

You are an entrepreneur. You really are!

PDD said...

comment for Janey.

josh williams said...

Roscoe I forgot our pact. Jane you Vixen you have tried to taint my fiendship (sp) with Roscoe and for that I forgive you cause your pretty and stuff....Roscoe I will not call you anymore names as long as I can hold back. Arghh.........Thank you come again

Henri Banks said...

parrots Hmmm they fly ,talk and get the bird flue !!!

morbid misanthrope said...

Dog shit never ceases to be humorous.

matty said...

Jungle Jane!!!!! Ing just told me something!!!

Is it true!?!?!?!!?!?!!!?!?!?!?!!??

I'm so excited!!!! ..I just can't hide.

I'm about to lose control and I think I like it!

um, I'm back now.

glad you shat in the dog's food bowl! nobody shits on a picture of you and gets away with it, baby!

ing said...

I'm gonna have a long, long talk with old Fido, there. If this image gets out, it's going to cause more riots than Mohammed.

(Still have to talk to my roommate, so don't change your plans -- she was asleep when I got home.)

jungle jane said...

Wally:
No that is actually a kangaroo. sorry - did you think it was a dog??

Bloodgood:
dude. please. give you dog a proper meal. even leftovers will be better than shit.

Adrian:
I can't wait to upload the picture i have of me rolling in it afterwards...

Toby:
yes i agree. i may even branch out into tampons if the demand is great enough.

PDD:
unfortunately it appears that dog shit is not tax deductable in this stupid country...

Henri:
Exactly. which is why i would NEVER allow a parrot to shit on my photo

Morbid:
Tits are always funny too. check back here tomorrow

Matty:
totally true! i am just wrestling with the finer detail at the moment - i should have some news for you tomorrow! wooooohoooooo...

Ing:
don't worry about that side of it...the australian tax man has it covered. just make sure you have a night free and sturdy earplugs!!

wolf-snaggle-tooth said...

Junglist posse..
Blow your whistles & horns..
Junglist crew get down & groove..
Junglist jane..
Do you mix it up are you in the four four beats Or are you strickly breaks style..
Doo you poo on photos of dogs>>

josh williams said...

I fixed you bathroom. The toilet was running so I shut the water off and glued the lid shut. I finished with a nice mauve toile wallpaper and some period photographs I snagged at the OBGYN's office nearby. Sorry for your troubles. Forgiveness is a gift and you are one heck of a gift thanks JJ! JW

DorianGray1854 said...

Please don't feed that mutt my liver.

Toby said...

You'll be doing a great service for the environment with all that recycling.

jungle jane said...

wolf-snaggle:
funnily enough i like rock and hard metal with a bit of punk and reggae thrown in. unless i am off my nut off course. then its pure drum and bass..

Josh:
i am soooo reluctant to complain...but...um....my arse appears to be glued to the toilet lid....

Dorian:
Your liver is just taking the garbage out and then it's going to make me a nice ham sammy. it asked me to tell you that it won't be going back to you. so sorry.

Toby:
Well yes. and of course i get to duck my taxes because vending machines take cash...

crallspace said...

That's not nice.

jungle jane said...

it's funny though....

Chris Moonbeams said...

Hi, I was surfing the internet and happened on your blog. I'm quite impressed , with how this all works. This is one to watch.

Best wishes,

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