28 June 2006

Bored at work?

1. Choking Kojak
3. A device for finding furniture in the dark.
4. Soft and warm when you go to bed but hard and stiff when you wake up
6. A type of food that never digests and is clearly visible in one’s shit
8. Your employer
11. A poop milkshake
13. nut sack
15. Prevents males from shitting on their testicles
18. _______ Week (Common term for a woman’s menstrual period)
19. The ugliest kid in Grade 2
20. World Champion and all round nice guy?
21. One who has undesirable or negative qualities


2. The similarity between a choir boy and a queer boy
3. A foodstuff high in protein
5. Occurs when you use Herbal Essence shampoo
7. Frequent public areas in search for having sexual intercourse with the same gender
8. An activity frequently conducted in the shower
9. An animal with a cunt half way up it’s back (2 words)
10. Computer V.D.
12. A long word for a short word
14. ( + )( + )
16. A Blogger who doubles as a human coathanger
17. The rounded part of a man’s knob


jemison said...

Hurray, I'm first! And finally JJ, a post I'm not scared to open in my office....

PDD said...

Janey, I am so excited to do this crossword without cheating. I swear I will not look at the answers until I think I am done. I never cheat at games. When I used to skip classes in highschool to play uker and my partner would try and cheat with me to win, I always let it be known to my opponent. No one ever wanted to be my partner for this very reason. So I swear, I wont cheat. I think I have already figured a few. I am excited to fill in the crossword.

Oh my god, am I a nerd?

~d said...

OMIGOD. I so totally SUCKED at the answers! JEEZ!
this was FUN though!
GOOD LUCK, pdd! I hope you do WAY better than me!

Zen Wizard said...

This is possibly the funniest thing I have ever seen.

And I have seen you naked so that is saying a lot.

Tickersoid said...

That's the next night shift sorted then.

Toby said...

Zen, it's not funny, it's sincere.

PDD said...

The only ones I got correct were:


Wow, all this talk and I want to admit myself to a brothel.

Egan said...

I'm so relieved number 11 down isn't me.

jungle jane said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
jungle jane said...

Oh deary me I very much hope that your boss doesn’t walk by and decide to ‘help’ you by filling in a few of those answers. Especially the one that says “pimp”

Oh I am so glad you like puzzles, PDD – I adore them too. Actually I once dumped a guy because he cheated in Scrabble – it’s a very sad day when people cheat their mates over a game. I am certain your wings will soar PDD – you are going to rock this puzzle, I know it

Maybe you should have done it on the train? That’s where most people seem to have crossword success. It really was very easy though – when you knew the answers

Making crosswords is a heck of a lot harder than it looks, I tell you. Next time I will do one that is entirely devoted to your ties. And a bit of light bondage

The only thing that can make you click on that “show me the answers” link is yourself Tickers. You can do this – I just know you can

You would have DEFINTELY known the answer to at least one of them, right?

STUNNING effort! i am so proud! well done PDD - although i am certain that you should have got Sweetcorn - i can only think that you don't eat it??

Actually you were also a clue in one of these, but I will leave it to you to figure out which one. The clue would have read “another name for Egan”….

Toby said...

My mind is mostly boggled.

Thank you from hoo hoo

Egan said...

7 Across?

Adam said...

I thought 17 down was pretty clever. I thought though that poop milkshake was boob milkshake thought that was an odd thing to make but I'm sure someone somewhere has made one

josh williams said...


world champ stephen neal said...


jungle jane said...

Boggle is a very good word game that i played as a kid. I think it involved dice with letters on them that you rattled in a cup and then made words out of them. or something.

No. You might be a pimp, but you are not my boss. its less flattering, i'm afraid

the whole thing is clever. its very hard to arrange rude words on a grid. hard, i tell you.

Is bravo a clue? or an answer? if not, well it should be. Wow Josh - you are a talented crossword writer too. you are a man of multiple ability Josh

Thats a clue for my next crossword. in this one i preffered to use the more polite word - taint.

Mone said...

even I do a lot of blogging at work, this is so much more fun. Thank you JJ for thinking of us and making my day.

BEAST said...

When is someone going to invent a dyslexics crossword...
Life is so unfair
****has tantrum***

****flounces off****

Dora and Tina said...

I actually did alright on this one...Tina wouldn't let me cheat she's like having pdd on your team. She neve cheats. But, even with the one-time cheat, I still did alright.

Qenny said...

Fantabulous. That must have taken you ages!

Vince said...

I don't do crosswords. But I color!

jungle jane said...

I am here to serve. My pleasure comes from your pleasure. Maybe next time i will make a Jungle Jane jigsaw puzzle for your children??

great idea. i'll just do a crossword full of jumbled up letters and clues that don't mean a fucking thing. One of my clues will spell out The Champ and i will get a gazillion Fighting Points into the bargain. Ha!

way to go, you legend. i bet you got sweetcorn right? am i right? am i right?

it started out as a fun thing to do but let me tell you its a lot fucking harder than it looks. to inject comedy into it is even harder. this is probably why most crosswords are not funny.

Okay next time i will do a JJ colouring in stencil. it will be heaps of fun - i'll add my cats and dildos to the picture too. and my bong. this could be a winner, Vince. it could.

ChickyBabe said...

Bummer! I had first comment this morning on this post and now I can't see it! I even forgot what I wrote (half a bottle of red ... hic!).

BTW, re your comment on my blog (back up etc) email me if you like :).

Mone said...

We love Jigsaw puzzles!

Or maybe you should put out coloring books,JJ? Thats the money making breaking idea!

Anita said...

Jane I'm partial to word finds. Crosswords require effort and I'm not smart enough for them. For example: #22. I still don't get which one has the twat. *sigh* Why must the elitists always alienate me?

world champ stephen neal said...

Your scheming has brought you much disgrace.

Make it happen, and you'll get your points.

Toby said...

Ah, 11 down. I feel vey special to be included in your crossword puzzle. Thanks.

jungle jane said...

ohhhhhh you have solved the back up issue? nice one - i will drop you a note. you other comment is in the answers section, by the way.

I love the idea of making money AND keeping the children of the world entertained. I will start working on it immediately. bugger my deadlines - the world needs a JJ colouring in stencil.

just go to the 'answers' section, copy them down and pretend you got them right. or leave a copy on your boss's desk - everyone loves to complete someone else's crossword, right?

thats not scheming - it is merely rising to the challenge and being honestly competitive. and i am NOT taking performence enhancing drugs other than beer either. Please note Champ - you are now part of my crossword - the Jungle always delivers in a timely fashion.

oooops the numbering order changed. you are now 16 down. i am delighted to have you in my quizz.

~d said...

THE TAINT! I effing LOVE the taint...waa-hahh-haa!
Huurah! Hurray!
(Anyone remember Hee-Haw?)

~d said...

Ohh, hahah...blogger who dbls as a coathanger! HAHA
GURL, blowjob week? Eff that-Mother can swim in the red river so long as he don't drink from it...
(Dude, why do my meds ALWAYS kick in on your site?!)

ChickyBabe said...

I can be such a blonde! :P

josh williams said...

That worked so well the first time...Here goes...Bravo!

MJ said...

Yesterday I saw the new documentary "Wordplay" about crossword puzzles. I couldn't help but think, "what if Jungle Jane ran the Crossword Puzzle Tournament?" It would have been a completely different film then!

Anita said...

Jane that might work. But when you refer to "my boss" does that mean you? I'm so confused and tired of learning. Honestly I've already spent all my mental energy being enraged about politics. (whines) It's hard to be an American.

Steph said...

Haaaaaaa! You is so talented! That shit should be in like Take 5 or some other mag. Watch the nanna's choke on their Earl Grey then!

Toby said...

As much as I enjoy being a part of this, I'd much rather be a Jane hanger.

matty said...

You know --- I can't do puzzles. I just can't. No matter how I might try, my mind can't get around it. Luckily, I never get bored at work with all the endless Madonna/Kylie/Gwen remixes and faux gay drama --- stays interesting so I don't need to be smart enough to do puzzles.

Denny Shane said...

I cannot figure out the answer for 69 down and I don't want to cheat.

josh williams said...

Hmmmm? Bravo!

Brookelina said...

This is all just to keep us busy so we won't notice that you have actually gotten yourself a life. Well it won't work!

I'm gonna need some help with this.

Toby said...

Denny, 69 goes both ways, up and down.

mushroom said...

hahaha toby!

Die Muräne said...

"I am here to serve. My pleasure comes from your pleasure."...

Good girl!!

wallycrawler said...

I hate fuck'n crosswords , but I gotta admit this one was kind'a fun !

I would have found a place for the words "Blumpkin" or "Blumpy" though . Other wise great work again JJ !

world champ stephen neal said...

Greetings Jane. 20 across got you 100 Fighting Points. You can swing on my vine anytime...

Last Girl On Earth said...

Jane... YOU ARE BRILLIANT! I don't think they'll give you a job at the New York Times writing crosswords, but who reads that stuck up paper anyway?


The Taker of Gist said...

Is it just me, or do all those words have vowels in them?

Polyman2 said...

I think this one will go straight to
th NY Times.

josh williams said...

I am so proud I completed the crossword and I believe I did not use one real word! I made them all up, now I am in the refinement stage of their definitions using the question as a guideline. I think I will submit my new words to the people who publish the OED and give them the entire etymology of the word, all of it made up! If not me someone else will make up the word, so I will by God give my two bits back to human kind and help to make this world a better place with more words that will never be seen in a classroom atmosphere.

world champ stephen neal said...


Bostick said...

Hi. Nobody is looking at my blog and that sucks so I am posting at every blog I run across trying to get readers. Please look at my blog I feel like a loser because my wife is the only one who has commented. Thanks, im I am not a perv or anything haha